Jackson waffles about the history of the Ibrox club, while Celtic, the club with a real and valid history, are on the cusp of making history…

Looking at the media today, you’d be forgiven for thinking there was only one game that mattered being played in Europe this week.

And only one team playing in Europe this week.

For the last few days, it’s been wall to wall coverage of the Ibrox side’s trip to Manchester.

The city that was subjected to a visit from the Ibrox fans in 2008 which was described as “The worst night of violence since the Blitz”.

Well, I’m sure the city of Manchester is bracing itself once again for a visit from those wonderful fans.

They probably have less to worry about from the incoming Storm Eowyn.

However, I’m digressing slightly here.

As I said, you’d never imagine Celtic were on the cusp of making their own history tonight in Europe’s premier competition.

All of the usual Ibrox cheerleaders have been wheeled out to give their various opinions.

And they all seem to think that the Ibrox side can cause an upset at Old Trafford.

Simply because Ruben Amorim stated that he thought this United side might be the worst in history.

But it’s Keith Jackson sycophantic trip down memory lane in the Record today that is the most cringeworthy of all the recent media coverage on this fixture.

Jackson is, after all, the King of Cringe.

He pulls out all the stops today.

Trying to start his article like an historic homage to both clubs, he conveniently omits that one of the clubs involved tomorrow night possesses a history that spans no more than 13 years.

And that the one he discusses pre-2012 is dead.

You don’t have to wait too long before he tries to hold both clubs in the same esteem.

Which, as we all know, is complete and utter bullshit.

Here it is:

Manchester United and R*****s may still carry their history with considerable pride. But when they square up to one another tomorrow night at Old Trafford, both of these once mighty clubs will be clinging on to their pasts rather than embracing the here and the now of it all.

Correction, one desperately clings to the history of the it’s dead predecessor.

The other’s history is entirely unbroken and intact.

And that “once mighty club”?

Spent itself into the grave with other people’s money, including money belonging to the deceased monarch they once so lovingly adored at Ibrox.

So spare us the history lesson, Keith, it has the same veracity as the fabricated history of World War 2.

This particular paragraph was also quite farcical:

United haven’t been the same global force since Ferguson stood down almost 12 years ago. R*****s have won only one Scottish title since Smith stepped away from the dugout amid the takeover mayhem of 2011. All manner of willing candidates have since tried to prove themselves to be worthy successors. But each of them has fallen some distance short.

Amid the takeover mayhem of 2011?

So that’s all it was?

A takeover gone badly wrong?

And the current Ibrox entity?

Yes, they’ve only managed to win one title in their short existence on this planet.

When the whole planet was in throes of a pandemic induced lockdown.

Look, I could go on and on tearing this work of complete and utter fiction apart.

But I couldn’t be bothered wasting my time.

I’m more concerned about the game that’s happening tonight.

You know?

The one that involves another Scottish side?

The one that is the most successful club in Scottish football history.

A club that doesn’t need to cling onto the past glories of a deceased football club.

Because it’s been around since 1888 and has never pretended to be something it’s not.

Yes?

Well, that club is on the verge of making history tonight.

By booking a passage to the knockout stages of Europe’s premier competition, the Champions League.

Not the Europa League, second tier competition.

You wouldn’t think that the game that will be played at Celtic Park tonight was actually of any significance at all when you trawl through the media today.

No, the teenage club’s trip to Old Trafford has everyone wetting themselves.

Bazza Ferguson is nearly jizzing in his pants at the thoughts of it, while the village idiot reckons it’s a golden opportunity for the heap more misery on Manchester United.

I must admit, I loved the way the village idiot referred to the Ibrox side’s away record, and how it’s scuppered their chances of stopping Celtic from doing 4 in a row.

4 in a row?

Note how they’re terrified to refer to it as title no. 55 for Celtic?

Anyway, it’s going to be hilarious if they’re the victims of the expected backlash from United’s humiliating home loss to Brighton last weekend.

But I guess we’ll just have to wait and see.

Put it this way, if they manage to get a result of any kind, it’ll be wall to wall coverage for the next week at least in the media.

And if we manage the insignificant feat of qualifying for the Champions League knockout phase?

I’m sure we’ll get a token mention from the SMSM.

Because after all, it’s just not that significant, is it?

Nope, the juvenile club’s day out to Manchester is all that matters.

A meeting of the worst Ibrox side in 12 years, and the worst Manchester United side in history.

Box office viewing.

Yeah right.