‘Celtic fan’ David Dickinson in line for this season’s award for ‘worst refereeing decision ever in a single season’, after yesterday’s doozie at Tannadice

Now, most people will wonder why I’ve started my headline with the declaration that David Dickinson is a Celtic fan, so I’ll explain.

After last season’s revelation on Follow Follow that all referees are under the command of the unseen Fenian hand, we must now automatically assume that all Scottish referees are Celtic fans.

Therefore, by default, David Dickinson is now a Celtic fan.

He might not have been one before, but if Follow Follow logic is to be adhered to, he has been brainwashed by the unseen Fenian hand.

So, he’s now a Celtic fan.

There now, glad we got all that sorted.

Moving on swiftly.

Today, it would appear that because of his ‘Celtic leanings’, David will be prone to making inexplicably stupid decisions as a referee.

Yesterday at Tannadice was proof positive of that, that’s for sure.

Robbie Copeland of the Record is at pains to explain to us how he’s now in line for the ‘worst refereeing decision in a single season ever’ award.

Former EPL referee, Dermot Gallagher branded the decision in question as baffling.

Now, to attach some proper context to this decision, we must first reveal who was watching the monitors in Clydesdale house as the VAR.

It was, of course, none other than utter raving Celtic obsessive, John Beaton.

Ibrox supporters lost the plot when he handed the title on a plate to his favourite team at Fir Park last season.

I mean, how could we possibly forget the way he snatched the title so cruelly from Hearts, and in doing so won the ‘worst refereeing decision in a single season ever’ award for himself for season 25/26.

Taking that into consideration, it was inevitable he would be behind ensuring his colleague David Dickinson pretty much has the award in the bag for season 26/27.

Because it will take some beating for him to lose it with this doozie.

I’ll let Robbie Copeland explain to you exactly what happened:

The bizarre incident took place just before half-time during Dundee‘s 2-0 win at Tannadice, when United defender Abdoulaye Yoro was initially shown yellow after being adjudged to have brought down (Ryan) Finnigan on the edge of the box.

After a delay, Dickinson was called over by Beaton to the monitor, and returned to the field of play to overturn the initial decision and instead book Finnigan for diving.

The Dundee midfielder looked astonished, as did the viewing public at home who saw in the replay that while there may have been no foul from Yoro, Finnigan had clearly just tripped over his feet.

Dermot Gallagher felt that David Dickinson had been put in a very difficult position by Celtic nut, John Beaton.

I suppose when you got previous for these kinds of mind blowing decisions, that was inevitable.

Here’s what Gallagher had to say on Sky Sports:

My face was a bit like Finnigan’s (when I saw it)! The problem here is that the VAR has tried to be too microscopic.

It’s not a foul (by Yoro), but that happens. Referees make mistakes on the field of play. The player’s got the ball and the referee thinks he’s got his ankle, which he hasn’t, so he gets the yellow card for that.

Finnigan then loses his balance and treads on the ball. That’s why he goes over.

So we’ve got a situation where it’s not a yellow card to Yoro, but it’s certainly not a yellow card to Finnigan.

But by sending him to the screen, the VAR has said Yoro’s got the ball and Finnigan has dived, which he hasn’t.

Celtic daft Beaton has previous for using microscopes in his decision making.

Apparently at Fir Park, he would have needed one to see the handball by Sam Nicholson that handed his favourite team the title.

That’s according to Ibrox fans anyway.

They don’t like John much, you know?

Because he’s off his trolley for Celtic, and they think he should never be refereeing any games involving his favourite side.

You know?

Fair enough, you’re getting the gist that this entire article is all satire.

But what a decision all the same?

Scottish referees, delivering the utterly unbelievable weekly at a football match near you.

We’re about 5 seconds into the new season, and they’ve gone out and given us a hun-dinger already.

It’s only just begun, folks.

It’s only just begun.

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