Dermot Desmond plays Football Manager with Celtic – if he burnt it to the ground for the fun of it, it would barely make a dent in his finances…

To most Celtic fans, Dermot Desmond is something of an enigma, mysterious, puzzling, and difficult to understand.

The mysterious and puzzling thing about him is that he just seems to stand idly by when Celtic looks like it could be hurtling headlong towards a crisis.

Admittedly, most crises at Celtic are entirely of the club’s own making.

Maybe he’s so used to that, he is steadfast in his belief that he can pull it back from the brink if he so chooses to.

To somehow understand the enigma that is Dermot Desmond, you have to understand a billionaire.

Some people might say that understanding a billionaire when you’ve never been one is virtually impossible.

But it’s not really.

The fundamental difference between you or I, and a billionaire, is this.

We work hard most of our lives to earn money, and to be able to afford the kind of lifestyle to which we wish to become accustomed.

A billionaire worked hard to become a billionaire, and a billionaire would probably have burned a lot of people along the way towards reaching that status.

Billionaires are generally ruthless

They are not empathetic people.

They don’t care who they hurt to reach their goals.

Machiavellian, callous and narcissistic are generally the kind of words associated with a billionaire.

They firmly believe in themselves and nobody else.

To emphasise this, here is a quote from Dermot Desmond:

If a million people told me to do something [in a body of] only a million and one, and I was the one and I didn’t feel that something was right, then I would take my own counsel. And they can shout, and they can exhort all they like, and I will not change my opinion if I think it is the right thing for this club.

You see, the difference between a billionaire and you, or I, is that money is no object to a billionaire.

It is not relative to them.

It is as available to them as inhaling the air we all breathe.

Because they do not have to think or worry about money, their mind becomes occupied with other things.

Such as building a portfolio of nice, shiny things.

Yachts, private jets, fancy cars, businesses, properties, airports and of course, football clubs.

In the last quarter of a century, football clubs have become the stylish playthings of billionaires.

Some billionaires do not develop a deep and vested interest in the clubs they own, rather, they pay people to ensure the clubs they own are run properly.

They ensure the correct structures are in place, and that their clubs also have the right people in place.

This is not the case at Celtic

Dermot Desmond, or the ‘God King’, as he has come to be known lately in Celtic circles, is a much, much different prospect.

Once again, I take no credit for the title given to our ‘Godly’ principal shareholder, that credit belongs entirely to John Hughes of Son of Celtic.

John has become something of an expert nomenclator of late, and I’m more than happy to put the titles he has given to certain Celtic individuals on our board into good use.

With the God King at Celtic, there is one fundamental difference between him and other billionaire owners of football clubs.

Dermot Desmond does not own Celtic.

However, he likes to give the impression that he does.

The key is in the title ‘principal shareholder’.

Yet so feared is he by everybody else invested in the club, nobody is willing to challenge his declaration of ownership.

Not even the manager, who refers to him as the ‘owner’.

Once again, for posterity, Dermot Desmond does not own Celtic

But because he lives in a world where nobody challenges his authority through fear of the repercussions if they did, his declaration of ownership goes unchallenged.

And so it goes.

Billionaires are often compared to Walter Mitty – the famous fictional character created by James Thurber who escapes his mundane reality through grandiose, heroic daydreams.

Many finance titans like Desmond use their immense wealth to turn eccentric, adolescent fantasies into their actual reality.

Desmond claims he has been a Celtic fan all his life, so if he was, I’m sure when he was young he fantasised about owning Celtic.

I know I have.

Modern billionaires have the capital to fund, build, and roleplay their own wildest daydreams.

It just so happens that we have had the rotten luck to have someone like Dermot Desmond want to do that with Celtic.

What’s even more fascinating about this is the fact that he doesn’t actually own Celtic

Oh, he could if he wanted to.

He could buy the club outright in the morning, if he so wished.

So, get this.

Dermot Desmond gets to live the actual fantasy of owning a football club, without actually fully owning it at all!

In addition to that, he knows he has the power to buy Celtic any time he wants.

Now, you can’t deny that this must be very, very satisfying to the God King.

He gets to play God King of Celtic without actually having invested any of his money into the club since December 2005.

Almost 21 years ago.

Over the course of those 21 years, he has been scaremongering everyone into believing that he owns Celtic.

And it’s got to the point where he has the placemen at Celtic who would not dare to challenge his authority

As a result, he now has an almost crippling control over the football club.

Now that Desmond is in his twilight years, it appears as if he is getting more cantankerous with age.

He also has a lot more time on his hands in his latter years.

He uses a lot of that time engaging in his favourite pastime, golfing with the celebrities, as well as out in his resort in Barbados.

It is clear though, that over the years, out of all the shiny things he has accumulated in his lifetime, Celtic seems to be the one he likes to control the most.

Whether that extends from the thrill of getting away with acting as if he is in full ownership of the club, or the incessant need for control that possesses all billionaires, is unclear.

But make no mistake about it, Desmond has complete control over Celtic.

Celtic is almost like his own personal game of Football Manager.

It’s as if he likes to play the unofficial ‘Moneyball’ mode in Football Manager with Celtic.

But not only does he like to do that, it seems as if he derives some sort of sadistic pleasure out of playing with the minds of thousands of Celtic supporters

Knowing how angry his actions make the fanbase, and also knowing we can do little to nothing.

Do you think or imagine that Desmond doesn’t watch our podcasts and read what we write?

Do you think that he doesn’t sit back in his chair while reading fan media content with a smug smile on his face, and sadistic sense of self satisfaction?

Saying to himself, ‘They’re right, everything they say is right. But I’ll do the total opposite……because I can, and they can’t stop me’.

Who do you think banned fan media from Celtic Park?

When Desmond said in his infamous million and one quote that he would take his own counsel over that of the million, who do you think he was referring to?

Who was the million?

It’s blatantly obvious that we were.

He will never listen to the Celtic fanbase, and he will do everything to spite us

He is doing everything to spite us.

Celtic is his own personal shiny version of Football Manager, and he will play with it as he sees fit.

Nobody will tell him otherwise.

Nobody.

This is why our club is in a doom spiral right now.

Desmond could burn it all to the ground in the morning, and it would barely put a dent in his portfolio.

He would go on being a billionaire, while we would be devastated.

That is the power this man has over our club.

It’s a scary thought, isn’t it?

I’ll just let that sit with you….

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