Finally Celtic confirm Martin O’Neill as manager, it only took them six days. Now will we have to wait until August before a single signing is announced?

Well, the big day is finally arrived yesterday.

After six days of dragging this announcement out like a hostage video, Celtic Football Club officially confirmed Martin O’Neill as our Football Manager on a one-year contract, with a one-year option.

Six days.

Six.

Last Friday, the season was over, the Scottish Cup was lifted in the Hampden sunshine 20 days previous, and every Celtic supporter on the planet knew exactly who was getting the gig.

It still took the puppet master golfer in Barbados the best part of a week to sign his name on a piece of paper.

But hey, what do I know?

This is just how this board likes to work.

Drag it out, milk the news cycle, let “exclusive” after “exclusive” drip into the SMSM, and then – when there’s literally nothing left to brief – Silent Mike finally hits send on the press release.

Aren’t we just blessed?

The official statement, brought to you by the same board that paraded Robbie Keane as a serious option for the Celtic job.

Here is what our forever-interim chairman, Brian “Unity” Wilson, had to say:

“I warmly welcome Martin’s re-appointment and look forward to more of the same leadership, inspiration and success he has delivered for the club.”

Warmly.

The same chairman who, lest we forget, has spent the last fortnight pretending Robbie Keane was a credible candidate is now warmly welcoming the man who actually went out and won us the league and the Scottish Cup last month.

Big of him.

Then we have Silent Mike, chiming in from behind his “world class” coffee machine:

“We are really pleased to keep Martin as manager. His knowledge and experience proved vital to us last season and we know his leadership will be hugely important to us going forward.”

Really pleased.

Knowledge and experience proved vital.

So vital, in fact, that it took 20 full days after the Cup final to commit to keeping him.

Indeed.

And then, of course, the absent golfing meddler himself, beamed in from his villa in Barbados:

“Time and time again Martin has shown his qualities and what he can bring to Celtic. We know he is a winner, we know what the club means to him and he continues to be the outstanding candidate to give us the best opportunity to realise our objectives.”

The outstanding candidate.

The outstanding candidate.

If he was so outstanding, why was Robbie Keane being shortlisted as recently as last weekend??

Why was Craig Bellamy a name??

Why was Shaun Maloney being lined up for a role nobody on the planet asked for??

Apparently the outstanding candidate had to be paraded past two journeymen and a coaching role nobody wanted before Dermot could be persuaded to do the obvious thing.

Pull the other one. It’s got bells on.

Make no mistake, this is St. Martin the Hunskelper saving the Celtic board from themselves all over again.

Let’s be honest here.

Martin O’Neill is not signing a one-year contract with a one-year option because he’s desperate for the work.

He’s signing it because somebody inside the rotting Celtic boardroom finally woke up.

Handing the keys to Robbie Keane in the same week as the season ticket deadline would have set Celtic Park on fire.

So St. Martin the Hunskelper has once again stepped in and saved their cowardly hides.

Nine major honours.

A domestic Treble in his first season in charge, the first Treble for Celtic in 32 years.

A European final in Seville.

A 56th Premiership and a 43rd Scottish Cup last month.

Won by winning the last seven league games in a row.

One of the most staggering finishes in the history of Scottish football.

And these clowns took six days to confirm him.

Because nothing says “ambition” quite like dithering over one of the most successful Celtic managers of the modern era.

So now, the obvious question: where are the signings?

We are eleven days into June.

The Champions League qualifiers start in mid-July.

Pre-season is barely four weeks away.

And we have not announced a single new player.

Not one.

Meanwhile, at Ibrox, they’re getting on with it.

Armitage Shankland is signed, sealed, and already wearing the training gear.

Findlay Curtis, back for round two with his new Ibrox bosses.

The Raynjurz are cummin, peepul.

At Celtic Park?

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ…

Wait, was that a fax machine I just heard cranking up?

Alas no, that was the sound of Silent Mike’s “world class” coffee machine doing the hard yards as he sits in the boardroom wondering why nobody is phoning him from Barbados.

It is not in hand.

It hasn’t been in hand for eighteen months.

Convenient, isn’t it??

The same board that took six days to confirm a manager will take six weeks to confirm a transfer.

Mark my words.

Genuinely.

Ask yourself.

Look at the track record.

Look at the players Martin was “guaranteed” in January.

Oxlade-Chamberlain.

Julian Araujo.

That’s your lot.

Look at the names already linked who have quietly walked away from us.

Jens Berthel Askou off to Toulouse without a second look back.

Look at the Director of Football role.

Still empty.

Anybody fancy placing a bet that the first marquee signing of this transfer window lands the day before the Premiership opener in August??

I’ll wait.

But St. Martin the Hunskelper is back in the building.

The manager job is finally done.

And the bar for what counts as competence at this football club is now so low it’s drilled through the bedrock.

Six days to confirm him.

Six.

World class??

World class amateurs.

Key Takeaways

• Celtic have officially confirmed Martin O’Neill as manager on a one-year contract with a one-year option, six days after the Scottish Cup final.
• The announcement came with warm words from Brian Wilson, Michael Nicholson, and Dermot Desmond – the same board that spent a fortnight briefing Robbie Keane as a credible candidate.
• O’Neill’s record speaks for itself: nine major honours, a Treble in his first season, a European final in Seville, and the league and cup double last month.
• Celtic have yet to announce a single signing for the summer transfer window, with Champions League qualifiers starting in mid-July.
• The Director of Football role remains unfilled.

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